My Triumphant Return/Tomorrow’s Douchebag of the Day!!!

I spent the last few days writing intros for my first article back from the beautiful city of Toronto, but I’m no good at that, so I will instead copy the exact words of a great American philosopher:

“Guess who’s back (Back, back) back again (-Gain, gain) Shady’s Kenny’s back (Back, back)  Tell a friend (Friend, friend).” 

Suck on that, Plato.

“Say what, bitch?”

Anyways, I had a great time in Toronto, I’ll have to tell you all about it someday, but today, I have a new Douchebag of the Day to skewer tomorrow, when I get past jet lag.

I considered doing the Egyptian government for their massacre of civilians, but that would just open up a whole shitload of political jargon from me that nobody wants to read. I would also bring up that dumbass Russian athlete that voiced her support for Russia’s retarded anti-gay laws, but a) I can’t remember her name and b) That happened yesterday anyways.

Thankfully, a piece of information from the wide, largely unimportant, world of sports landed neatly in my lap. So tomorrow’s douchebag of the day is:

BUD SELIG

Stay tuned everybody!