How My TV Reviews Work

Still the best TV show within a TV show ever.

So, I’ve officially been reviewing television shows for about three weeks and, needless to say, I haven’t been doing a great job keeping up. I’m several days overdue on the reviews for episode 3 of Gotham, ditto for the pilot episode of Flash and a full week overdue for the fourth season premiere of Legend of Korra. Hell, I haven’t even finished the third season of the latter show.

In my defense, Henry Rollins’ character is meant to be savoured.

Also, as much as I hate that this is the case, I still have school to work through, and until I break free from that burden, I can’t really devote all my time into a blog that doesn’t make me any money or extra credit and, at this point, it’s just a passion project. So, unfortunately, I have to enforce some rules on these reviews.

  • The reviews will be out every two episodes. Both episodes will have a rating out of five, and the totals will be added up at the end of the season to give the season an average score out of 10.
  • If the season ends with a rating under 7.5/10, I probably won’t devote any more time to reviewing the show. I may still watch it, but I just won’t review it.
  • If the season’s rating ever falls under 5.0/10, I reserve the right to call it quits at the nearest quarter, half, or three-quarter mark, and if it ends the season with a failing grade, you can forget about me reviewing another episode of it ever again (For a season at least).
  • Expect the reviews to come out a day or two after the airing of the second episode. You know, unless a holiday gets in my way, or something.
  • When it comes to reviewing the baseball playoffs….I’m done. It takes a crapload of time and it’s just not that fun for me anymore. I’ll still do some baseball stuff, but definitely expect a noticeable shift away from athletics and more towards mindless entertainment.
  • Movie reviews will always get priority, so shows that air on weekends and Friday night are likely to get shafted, somewhat.

Get it? Awesome. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have some procrastinating to do!

Coming Soon to PKTM…

Whoever got the brilliant idea to start running back-to-school ads in July should be quietly executed.

Holy crap, so much for one hundred posts this year, huh?

In my defense, I’ve been kind of busy this past week what with starting my senior year of high school and working late for the last few days. And even worse, I don’t have a topic to rant about (At least, not one that hasn’t been rendered irrelevant thanks to procrastination on my part), or a movie on tap to review (Thanks to the fact that no interesting movies are coming out for a while).  However, far be from me to let some crappy education get in the way of my bitching about unimportant things. Here are some things coming up here at PKTM that I hopefully will not chicken out on actually writing (This is what is known as a “filler post”).

Movie Reviews: The most prominent feature of this blog isn’t going away any time, and, in fact is probably gonna get even more prominent now that I’ve discovered that public transportation is not merely a way for the mentally unstable to get from place to place. Fun fact: It’s also an effective way to get to movie theatres. Who knew, right?

I plan to do a lot more reviews for new movies, seeing them the Friday that they come out (And hopefully getting them out some time during the following weekend) or, failing that, as soon as I possibly can (Unless they’re horror movies, because 95% of horror movies suck). Some movie reviews that y’all should look forward to soon include (But do not exclude):

  • The Maze Runner
  • The Equalizer
  • Gone Girl
  • The Judge
  • Fury
  • The Book of Life
  • Fuckin’ Birdman!!!
  • Laggies
  • Interstellar
  • Big Hero 6 (If I can get into a showing devoid of small children)
  • Foxcatcher
  • The Hunger Games: Mockingjay -Part 1

So yeah, I’ll probably get around to seeing those movies (Unless circumstances prevent me), and I’ll do previously released movies as well, but maybe not as frequently as before (Which wasn’t that frequent to begin with). Also, as was the case before, I’ll be reviewing any movies nominated for Oscars or Golden Raspberries. Hopefully, I won’t end up two movies short again this year.

Hey man, you try figuring out what the hell to take away from The Great Beauty.

Other Movie Stuff: Ever wondered who would win in a fight to the death between the great Quentin Tarantino villains? No? Not even a little bit? Well, screw you guys, I want to figure that out.

Also, with a bizarre Dynasty Warriors/Legend of Zelda crossover coming out later this month, I ponder how one could adapt the video game phenomenon that is The Legend of Zelda to the big screen. If it should  be adapted at all, I mean.

And, with Disney following up the all-conquering juggernaut of a movie that was Frozen with Big Hero 6 in November, I count down the Top 15 animated films of the 21st century. Hopefully, I get around to finishing that.

An Introduction to Canada: I really hope to get back on this, because I really had fun doing the articles on geography, which is coincidentally the most fun I’ve ever had with anything geography related in my life.

Instinctive Rants: Poorly thought out, rushed and usually overly vulgar. God, I love ’em.

TV Reviews: More on this later, but long story short, I’m going to be reviewing TV shows (And the MLB playoffs, because why the hell not?) starting with Gotham later this month. Stay tuned, people.